Ray of Hope
by Lady Sigyn
Summary: Al has an epiphany as to his place in their journey and his family's relationship. (Set prior to ep. 1) One shot. Songfic-ish.


**Ray of Hope**

Disclaimer: _Fullmetal Alchemist_, it's characters and all related items are copyright to its rightful owners. I claim no rights to any of it nor to the song _Vertigo_, whose lyrics are used herein.

No house in the small town would take them in, because the large 'metal man' frightened them, and even though their words were kind, the people refused. So the two brothers found themselves sleeping in an alley that night, the younger of the two joking about how he hoped it would not rain, because he did not want to rust. This received only a sad smile from his older brother and the two fell into silence as a nostalgic sleep passed over them.

_Lights go down  
It's dark, the jungle is  
Your head can't rule your heart  
A feeling so much stronger  
Than a thought  
Your eyes are wide  
And though your soul  
It can't be bought  
Your mind can wander _

Al found it difficult to watch his brother sleep. His twisting and turning on the cold ground made him uneasy, and as he grimaced, Al found it difficult to not feel sorry for him. They had been traveling for quite a long time now, trying to find this man named Mustang. Al was certain Ed was just as much in the dark about the man as he was, but Ed found a lot brighter ray of hope about it all. Al had not seen his brother so excited about anything since the time they had studied so hard to bring back their mother. His thoughts immediately wandered, as the idea of his mother would have brought tears to his eyes – had he the liquid capacity to cry.

_Hello, hello  
Hola  
I'm at a place called Vertigo  
Dond' esta  
It's everything I wish I didn't know  
Except you give me something I can feel  
Feel _

That's when he realized Ed was most likely reliving those instances he had quickly scrambled by in his own thoughts. The pain his brother must have been experiencing in his dreams was perhaps just as terrible as it had been when it first happened, he could not think of it. He did not want to. He wanted to wake his brother, so Ed did not have to either, but their lack of sleep within the last day and a half prompted him not to. His large metal body turned only slightly to watch his brother once more.

_The night is full of holes  
These bullets rip the sky  
Of ink with gold  
They twinkle  
As the boys play rock and roll  
They know that they can't dance  
At least they know _

His brother's gloved hand clutched so tightly to nothing, Al could only imagine what fright he had. He remembered it well, having a body one moment, being nothing but air the next. He owed his life, literally his life, to his brother and there was no payback Ed wished to receive. Suddenly Ed cried out to Al – the boy did not move, but merely sighed sadly. Those cacophonous screams of the two young brothers of that day replayed well in Al's own memory, until he could not deal with it anymore. How Ed could sleep through it was beyond him.

I can't stand the beats  
I'm asking for the check  
Girl with crimson nails  
Has Jesus 'round her neck  
Swinging to the music  
Swinging to the music

Slowly, Ed's wailing stopped and Al's attention turned to the alley around them. A calico cat smelled the wall by him, but when it saw him it ran away in fear. He sighed in remorse and wished he could sleep. That was when he heard it. The murmur he could not believe. He sat up straight and looked down at his brother, who slept under a blanket that alchemy had made. His brother rolled onto his back and began to whisper. "Dead."

_Hello, hello  
Hola  
I'm at a place called Vertigo  
Dond' esta  
It's everything I wish I didn't know  
But you give me something I can feel  
Feel _

Al thought nothing of it at first, until Ed repeated it numerous times in his sleep. He was not sure who Ed was talking about, but it was most likely their mother. He was going to leave Ed to his dreaming once more, until Ed's repetitious whisper of "dead" began to frighten him. Remembering the lack of sleep Ed had experienced for a while, Al regretfully leaned forward and shook his brother to awaken. Ed's eyes flew open and he sat very still looking up at the sky as he slowly repeated the word "dead."

_Shot dead  
Shots fall  
Show me_

"Are you okay?" Al's eyes showed no emotion, but his voice was full of concern. Ed sat up, his braid hitting his brother's arm as it swung behind him. His eyes began to become a bit glossed over.

"I'm fine, Al."

"You..."

"It's just that," Ed interrupted his brother before he could ask him any questions. "He had better be dead. That is the _only_ reason he did not come to Mom's funeral. He is dead, and taking up a cemetery lot. You can't go to a funeral when you're dead. That's the only reason. He _better_ be dead."

_All of this, all of this can be yours  
All of this, all of this can be yours  
All of this, all of this can be yours  
Just give me what I want  
And no one gets hurt _

Al did not have to ask who Ed was talking about now. It was the only person Ed would ever want to be dead, their father. Had he been the one to die instead of their mother, Al would not have lost his body and Ed would not have lost any of his limbs, because Ed would not have lifted a finger to attempt to bring him back.

"Don't worry about it, Edward," Al said in a low voice. "You should go back to sleep. We can't have emotional breakdowns now."

"I'm not," Ed sighed and looked to the ground. He ran his finger along the spot in the ground where they had used a circle to make a blanket. "It's just..."

Al chuckled. "You're supposed to be setting an example for me, what would Mom think if she saw you like this?"

Ed glanced over at him and nodded. He was the older brother, he had to take initiative. "You're right, Al."

"Of _course_ I'm right," Al replied quickly. "You should get back to sleep, you know. We have a long ways to go tomorrow."

Ed laid back down on his back and crossed his arms over his stomach. "Thanks."

Al nodded his head and leaned against the wall again watching his brother fall asleep with better dreams. Had it been Ed who was always looking for the ray of hope? Had not Al always been the one running through the dark? He wished he could feel the cold, so he could shiver as Ed did in his sleep.

It was not right, though. They were brothers. There was no yin and yang, they supported each other. Sometimes one would be down, sometimes the other would. They always had to be there for each other, had that not been what their mother had taught them? After all, Ed was still mostly all flesh, he was human. Al could not get sick, nor cut, nothing of that sort. Where Ed watched out for him, Al had to watch out for his brother in places too. That was when he realized, he was useful after all. He could not smell, perhaps, nor cry, but he could feel.

"Ed?"

Ed was almost entirely asleep at Al's word. He grunted out a "Hnh?"

"We'll take turns being the big brother from now on, okay?"

Ed, no where close to the conversation, as he was as far into dreamland as he could get, merely made a sound of agreement, never knowing what he was agreeing to. They would watch out for each other. They had a long journey ahead of them, after all. Nothing of the past was important now, it was them in the present. They would be each other's ray of hope.

_Hello, hello  
Hola  
We're at a place called Vertigo  
Dond' esta  
Lights go down and all I know  
Is that you give me something  
I can feel Your love teaching me how  
Your love is teaching me how  
How to kneel  
Kneel _

End

A/N: Uh... hi. Um, I don't know why I wrote this. I felt like writing about the Elric brothers for some reason. If you know the song _Vertigo_ by U2, then you know I used a real fast and upbeat song in a sort of melancholy story, I thought it would be interesting. I am very sorry my sad excuse for writing has been put under the _Fullmetal Alchemist_ list, I know I'm an abomination to writers everywhere. I just got the need to write, so yeah... I'm going back to the _Inuyasha_ section now, so you don't have to deal with me. Thanks for wasting your time reading, I greatly appreciate it.


End file.
